Wow...it's been months since I have posted. Inspired last night by my beautiful sister who "picked up the pen", I decided maybe I should try and restart what I thought was going to be my new hobby back in September. Like my sis, I believed blogging could be a therapeutic escape. Yet, my seemingly great idea soon fell face first on the ground. A total of four posts and my awesome, "therapeutic" hobby came crashing down! Oops...
Thanks to "happy bean" I'm going to brush off the dust and pick myself back up! So here we go...my second attempt at a great journey....
If I were to ask you to share your first thought after I said the word transparency, how would you respond?
Fear? Beauty? Impossibility? Freedom? Arrogant?
Maybe these words came to mind for the following reasons:
Fear- Unveiling yourself might make you want to curl up in a ball and hide under a desk, hoping never to be found.
Beauty- Showing the true self to another, might have proved to be the most beautiful aspect of one of your relationships.
Impossibility- There is no way someone can be completely transparent, I mean, some things you just have to keep to yourself.
Freedom- Being real gives you a sense of freedom within relationships.
Arrogant- A person who exposes their core seems arrogant to me, like they are striving for attention.
I find that in life I have probably held all of the previously mentioned thoughts and feelings. However, over the past few years, one word has proven to be real in my life more so than any other. Beauty.
I love honesty. I adore realness. I thrive on knowing people to their core. I cherish depth in a relationship. I find beauty in transparency.
I have a beloved friend whom I met in college, EL. She and I have the most transparent relationship I have ever experienced. We share our fears, our joys, our struggles, our accomplishments, etc. with one another without hesitation. There is no shame. There is no judgement. There is only love, encouragement, and a listening ear. EL is transparent with me and I am transparent with her.
There has been immense beauty in our friendship because of the transparency we both possess. Now, don't get my wrong, I know transparency isn't easy and sometimes there are prices to pay if we choose that path. For example, we could be rejected. We could be condemned. We could be the brunt of coarse jokes as well as many other horrible things. However, when transparency is proven right, there is such beauty in the outcome.
Lately, I have been blessed with another friend ST who has shared her heart and her life with me in such an amazing way. She tells me her struggles, her boundaries, her fears, her thoughts, her confusions, her joys, her silly moments, her crazy dog stories, EVERYTHING. She has been transparent in our deepening friendship.
Both EL's and ST's stories have allowed me to see the beauty of transparency. Our relationships have blossomed in tremendous ways. We have connected far deeper than that skin deep, superficial connection many acquaintances and some friends have. We have exposed the depths of who we are, risking being ridiculed and condemned, in order to chance being loved and accepted. Let me tell you, being loved and accepted after exposing your struggles, mistakes, fears, and failures is the most joyful feeling you will ever experience. It is at that point you know you have a true friend.
Everyone needs that person to lean on whom knows them inside and out. I believe girls need other girls and guys need other guys. We need support. We need encouragement. We need to be loved despite what may be going on in our life. We are not meant to be in life alone.
I am thankful for having such a transparent conversation with my friend ST today. She is a gem whom I will never forget. I love her with all my heart. Thank you, ST!
I encourage you to be wise, but to offer the gift of transparency to a friend today. May you find the beauty of transparency that I have!